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Saturday, May 16, 2015

B.G.M. Offers a Reality Check



As a black gay man one of the issues that I have encountered and witnessed within all of the communities I exist in is the devaluation of voices.  

Living in an era where people want to believe that All Lives Matter, I have to challenge that belief because all voices are not given equal consideration and treatment. This devaluation of voices occurs between the majority communities and minority communities but also within both communities.

As a black man, my intelligence and views are often questioned and valued less than white counterparts who are less knowledgeable and credible than myself because of my race. The old adage of black people having to be "twice as good, in order to get half" applies here when you have to get twice the education or be two times higher in positions within the workplace and community in order to have your voice equally treated. Look at our own President of the United States, Barack Obama. Even with his position of being the "leader of the free world" his voice is devalued by people who lack his knowledge and intelligence simply because he is a black man.

As a gay man, my voice is devalued because I do not have heterosexual privilege. My relationships are not considered to be equal to those who engage in heterosexual relationships. Therefore when I talk about relationship issues or family issues my views are not equally considered because who I love and my immediate family doesn't look like the status quo.

Within the minority communities I come from, I have experienced devaluation of my voice from people who are just like me. Being academically credentialed can lead to being devalued because you do not have direct knowledge of those experiences, even when you do have direct knowledge. I have heard, "oh you're not from the hood", "you don't know my struggle", or "you're too book smart you don't know what it's like in the streets". Well you didn't even listen to my opinion or ask me about my experience before immediately dismissing what I have to say entirely.

Ageism often leads to devaluation because the assumption is that you have not had enough lived experience in order to form an informed opinion. Length of time doesn't mean that you have a better understanding than someone else. Both the young and the old have informed opinions that can inform and benefit each other, if they are willing to consider and listen to each other.

Attractiveness is also a factor that we don't always consider. If someone is not to your liking sexually of attractionally, their opinion is ask not considered equally. That's why certain voices are elevated over others because people like the packaging even though the message maybe the same or even less impactful. Look at Dreamgirls, Deena was elevated over Effie because she had a more "universal" appeal, aka traditional standard of Americanized beauty. It's like, oh I want to fuck him or her, let me listen, so I can get in, but then someone who is considered to be less attractive says the exact same thin than all of a sudden they are considered to be just angry or bitter because of their less attractiveness.

If we are gonna try to buy into the belief that "All Lives Matter" than we need to consider all voices. We need to not devalue each other. Our experiences need equal consideration and equal treatment it that value is ever gonna be achieved. Now, if we as a society are not gonna change our ways or behaviors than please quit the empty rhetoric and kindly "Shut the Fuck Up!"

However those from marginalized communities continue to raise your voices and make sure that you are heard. Raise your voice for yourself. Your gonna feel like no one is listening but you are getting your point out there and advocating for yourself. There is power in your voice and you have to exercise it by any method you have and whether or not anyone hears you. Eventually, your whisper will be heard.


Keep those voices raised and check yourself on how you consider each other.

Yours Always,
The B.G.M.

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